5 months in…

So H is now 5 months old. Got her next lot of immunisations tomorrow, and I’ve also bitten the bullet and made myself a doctors appointment. Feeling way too crap all the time now so I know there’s definately something wrong. So angry all the time and so frustrated. This should be the best time of my life and I should be enjoying it so much, but I’m just so annoyed all the time! And feeling like I don’t want to get out of bed in the morning because it’s just going to be a repeat of the day before.

At least DH has a part time job now at pak n save, not good wages,but hey at least it pays some of the bills.

Still can’t get H to sleep in the day time which is driving me insane. The only place she falls asleep is on me either after a feed, or else if i’ve been rocking her for like 40 minutes! Then if i decide to try and put her in her bed she wakes up as soon as she’s in there and I can’t get her to go back to sleep. Feel like such a failure,and that there’s something I’m doing wrong.

She’s started rolling over all the time now, at first it was just front to back but now its back to front, and all day long. It’s so hard trying to keep her entertained while she’s not sleeping that sometimes i just feel like popping her on the boob all day so I get some peace and quiet and i can watch a movie or read a book.

But at the same time she’s so damn cute. It’s frustrating. One minute I will be so annoyed at her and then the next wonder how i’m getting so mad because I love her to bits.Gah. Why is this so hard?

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One Response to 5 months in…

  1. I so know what you’re going through. Noah went through a stage of barely sleeping in the day and if I did get him to sleep I put him down and he would wake up, they were looooong days. He used to roll everywhere as well, and it was so hard to keep him entertained as he was grizzly from being tired. I found the only thing that helped was getting into a routine of day sleeps, where after an hour or so when I saw tired signs, I followed a sequence of steps- go to bedroom, get in sleeping bag, bottle then cuddle/rock till sleepy and put in bed to sleep. I also had a mobile which I always put on so he knew what the music meant- sleep time. It was hard at first but following that over and over eventually led to him getting some day sleeps, usually only 45 minutes but gradually in time they got longer. I found what was good was putting him in bed when he was nearly asleep but not quite, then putting him on his side and patting his back so he actually fell asleep in bed rather than on me. Now he sleeps well in the day, I thought at the time he never would so there is hope. But if she just won’t sleep I find its easier to get them in the pram and go for a walk or go for a drive/wander round the mall rather than put up with the grizzling and endless trying to entertain them at home. At Hollys age I used to feed/rock to sleep whatever I had to do to get him to sleep, then once that was in place I weaned off that stuff. So don’t feel bad if you have to do it. You won’t always have to.

    I know what you mean also because I love Noah so SO much that sometimes I wonder how it is possible to feel so angry/annoyed with him, then I end up feeling even more guilty.

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